Darkness

Lying on my back, I can still see tiny sparkles of light, dancing around my head, surrounding me like fluttering butterflies. While I watch them, I realise that they convey a message of joy and happiness, a message of warmth and love. It feels so good, so comforting. Feeling a little dizzy, I’m almost drowning in this cosiness...

I look up: What is this? My slow mind discerns a ... a ... cloud? I’m not sure but I never saw something similar before. The butterfly-sparkles seem to become excited; somehow flying chaotically, they flee into nothingness and take their comfort with them. I stay behind: left, alone and confused...

Suddenly, I become aware of the spine-tingling cold drawing nearer and nearer. I ponder on it but I still have absolutely no idea what this is. It encircles me and I notice that even the last glimmering spark has vanished. Forever?

Then small, somewhat slimy hands and fingers look for me, find me, reach out for me, and finally touch me. Although they’re very gentle, they make me shiver because they are cold as ice...

My only wish is to follow my companions, the tiny butterflies, and their light: I want to run away, I want to escape this unknown scenario. Trying to move my legs or at least my toes, I realise that I can’t move... I’m too scared. But on the other hand, I’m somehow even curious. What is going to happen? Where are the sparkles? What is this?

The hands and fingers help me to understand while they crawl over my whole body as if they tried to explore every pore of my being. I cannot see them, it’s completely dark, but I can feel even better. Creeping coldness ... everywhere... On my skin, then under it... It feels odd but not awkward.

And this is the moment when I comprehend that this is exactly the way how it has to work. I give up my last resistance and finally start to feel at ease. This is the last thing I do before the welcoming darkness reaches my inner core and I sink into blissful oblivion...

25/11/2011